Emotional Intelligence

Managing your emotions, rather than being managed by them

Understanding yourself and understanding others – an emotionally intelligent person is someone who is consciously aware of their own emotional states, including negativity, and is able to identify and manage them.

Emotional IntelligenceSometimes called Emotional Quotient (EQ), it comprises 4 components which enable us to maximise our own performance and that of our team members:

Self awareness – Understanding our own strengths and blind spots; appreciating our self-worth and what we bring to the party; recognising our thoughts and feelings and how they impact us, our behaviours and the knock on effect on other people.

Self-management – Identifying and controlling our emotions; reining in the tendency to react disruptively; regulating moods; managing our own motivation levels; recognising and controlling stress factors; adaptability and agility.

Social awareness – Being able to empathise with others; recognising ‘other peoples’ needs, understanding the individual emotional make-up of other people; being fully ‘present’ when interacting and communicating.

Relationship management – Ability to foster long-term meaningful relationships; communication skills and being able to inspire and develop others; capacity to influence change and bring others on board.

Marya Mannes

'The sign of intelligent people is their ability to control emotions by the application of reason.'

The EI components show up as the following hallmarks – or traits – in real life:




Self-confidence; self-deprecating sense of humour; realistic self-assessment


Comfort with ambiguity; trustworthiness and integrity; high personal motivation

Social awareness

Optimism even in the face of failure; sensitivity towards others; rapport building

Relationship management

Able to build and retain talent; clear communication; builds team collaboration

People don’t always come to coaching asking for help developing ‘Emotional Intelligence’ – but so many of the key areas that are relevant to managers and leaders in the corporate world are intricately linked with the concepts underpinning EI.

Emotional IntelligenceUnderstanding yourself, recognising that others are different and developing strategies to help maximise working relationships are all key areas often covered during coaching – and you can see how these align with the core EI skills.

Consequently, the Everything DiSC psychometric tool can be a great way of gaining a deeper personal insight for managers and a truly effective springboard from which to launch your personal and professional development.

Emotional Intelligence can be learned – it takes commitment, time and effort – but we are all able to hone these valuable leadership traits and raise our game.